Uma umshado kumele ube phakathi kwendoda eyodwa nonkosikazi oyedwa, pho kungani kunesithembu kangaka ebhayibhelini?

Isithembu yilapho khona indoda inamakhosikazi angaphezu kweyodwa ngesikhathi esisodwa. Lokhu kuyenzeka kwezinye zezingxenye zase-Afrika. Isibonelo nje, ngike ngafunda umbhalo omfishane esikhathini esedlule, bekukhulunywa ngabantu abahlanu (5) besithembu abadumile eMzansi Afrika.

Kwesinye isikhathi uma abantu bevikela isithembu bathi siyindlela yokuvikela nokunakekela abantu besifazane – ikakhulukazi ngokwezezimali ezindaweni zabantulayo. Futhi kwamanye amadoda kungukuveza amandla awo nezinga akulo. Manje akusiso isikhathi sokukhuluma ngalezo zinhlangothi nezinye futhi. Kunalokho, Nanku umbuzo esigxile kuwo: Uma umshado kumele ube phakathi kwendoda eyodwa nonkosikazi oyedwa (njengoba amaKrestu esho), kungani kunesithembu kangaka ebhayibhelini?

Indlela esifunda ngayo ibhayibheli: echazayo (eshintshashintshayo) noma echazwayo (engaguquki)

Ake senze iphuzu elisemqoka lapha elizosisiza ukufunda ibhayibheli.

• Kwenye inkathi ebhayibhelini uNkulunkulu uthi: ‘lokhu kuhle’, noma ‘Izinto kumele zenziwe kanjena’.

Ngamanye amazwi, kubekiwe akuguquki. Cabanga udokotela okuyalela okumele ukwenze athi: ‘Thatha lamaphilisi izikhathi ezingaka, izinsuku ezingaka – kumele ube nawo, uyawadinga.

Ngakho, Kunezingxenye zebhayibheli lapho uNkulunkulu esiyalela ngokusobala okungaguquki. Uthi kumele silalele noma silandele, sikholwe noma senze,  noma sifise ngendlela ethize.

• Ngakolunye uhlangothi, kwenye inkathi izinto zilula ebhayibhelini ngokuba kulotshiwe ukuthi abantu benzani kanjani.

Ngamanye amazwi, kuyachazwa. Ibhayibheli lapha lichaza ukuthi abantu bazenza kanjani izinto futhi bazenzenjani. Alisho ukuthi ‘yenza lokhu ngalendlela’. Kepha lithi: ‘Abantu benza noma babenza izinto ngalendlela.” Futhi ziningi izibonelo zalokho ebhayibhelini, kusukela kwabangenandaba kuya kubabulali.

Kungabe singenaphi isithembu?

Ngingasho nje ngithi izibonelo zesithembu ebhayibhelini zingena kulokhu okubalwe ngasekugcineni lapha ngaphezulu: Lokhu okwenzeka okuchaziwe, kungesikho ekumele sikwenze. Sazi kanjani ukuthi kunjalo ngempela? Yithi ngiveze amaphuzu amabili.

1.UNkulunkulu ebhayibhelini uchazile ukuthi kumele ube kanjani umshado.

Encwadini kagenesise 1 no 2, ebese kuzoqhubeka uJesu encwadini ngokukaMarkhu 10, ngokukaMathewu 19 kanye noMathewu 5, uNkulunkulu wenza umshado ukuba ube phakathi kwendoda eyodwa nonkosikazi oyedwa. UNkulunkulu wawenza kanjalo. Futhi uchaza ukuthi kumele ube kanjani.

Futhi nje, Isithombe esikhulu emehlweni kaNkulunkulu ngukuthi ubudlelwane phakathi kwendoda nenkosikazi kukhomba eqinisweni elikhulu kakhulu (Kwabase-Efesu 5:22-33). Ngamanye amazwi, unkosikazi uhlonipha indoda yakhe, nendoda ithanda unkosikazi wayo, lokhu kumele kube yisithombe esincane sokukhulu nokuliqiniso eliphelele likaJesu ethanda abantu bakhe, ababizwa ngomakoti wakhe. Kulesikhathi ungadideki ngenxa yokuthi unkosikazi noma umlobokazi kaJesu wenziwa ngabantu abaningi – lokho akuvuleli isithembu. Cha, kuyisithombe, uphawu. Usamunye umlobokazi noma umakoti – ngisho enziwe ngabantu abaningi.

Umshado uphakathi kwendoda eyodwa nonkosikazi oyedwa. Njengokuba bonke abayeni bazi, ngisho ngabe kuthiwa umlingani wakho muhle kangakanani ngokwezenzo, umshado noma uyisipho, uphinde ube umsebenzi onzima. Kunzima kukodwa nje. Kunzima ngokwanele ukuthanda nokukhonza unkosikazi oyedwa njengokuba uKristu ethanda ibandla, kangakanani-ke amakhosikazi amaningi – kungasiyo ngisho indlela ekhomba kuJesu nendlela uNkulunkulu awudale ngayo umshado.

Ngakho-ke iphuzu lokuqala: UNkulunkulu ukwenze kwacaca ekuchazeni kwakhe umshado.

2.Izibonelo zesithembu ebhayibhelini zichaza into engagculisi.

Umuntu wokuqala owabalulwa njengowayenamakhosikazi ebhayibhelini uLamekhi encwadini kagenesise 4. Ngaphambi kwakhe, sase sibone uKhayini ebulala u-Abela. Ngenkathi sesifika kuLamekhi namakhosikazi akhe amabili ufuna ukuziveza ukuthi yena mubi kakhulu kunomubi (funda kugenesise 4:23-24), kuyacaca ukuthi izinto ziyanyukela, zishintshela kude nendlela okwakumele zibe ngayo ensimini.

Uma siqhubeka emibhalweni, sibona amanye amadoda ayenamakhosikazi amaningi. Kepha nanti iphuzu ekumele silidwebele lapha, akukho nokukodwa lapho kuhambe khona kahle noma kwaphela kahle. Uhlaka lamadoda adumile ayenesithembu ebhayibhelini lubala:

• U-Abrahama

U-Abrahama wathenjiswa ukuthi phakathi kwakhe nonkosikkazi wakhe uSara kuyovela isizwe esikhulu. Kepha bobabili sebekhulile kakhulu, uze uSara ngokungakholwa kwakhe uqhubekela phambili, unikeza isisebenzi sakhe u Hagari njengesancinza kisa-Abrahama, uphinda umenza umamncane.

Kulabo kinina abayaziyo indaba. Izinto azihambanga kahle. Ikakhulukazi ohlangothini lukaHagari – owaphathwa kabi uSara owayenesikhwele kanye no-Abrahama ongakwazanga ukumthanda.

• USolomoni

UDavide wayenamadazini amakhosikazi kanye nezancinza (2 kuSamuweli 3:1-5 kanye noMikhali noBatisheba; 5:13, 15:16), kepha uSolomoni wayenamakhosikazi angama-700 kanye nezancinza ezingama-300 (1 Amakhosi 11:3)

Manje asibe neqiniso: Amadoda amaningi angahalela ukuba kulesi simo. Kepha-ke kwaphela kanjani? Siyatshelwa ukuthi labo besifazane baholela inkosi eyayinamandla kakhulu ka-Israyeli ekukhonzeni izithombe. Inhliziyo yakhe yaya kwabanye onkulunkulu – onkulunkulu bamakhosikazi akhe.

Kepha uNkulunkulu ngoMose wakhipha isexwayiso encwadini kaDuteronomi 17:17 ukuthi kungabikho inkosi kwa-Israyeli ezitholela amakhosikazi amaningi. Kungani? Ukuze inhliziyo yayo ingeke iphaphalaze noma idukiswe. Kepha uSolomoni? Kunokuba abe nonkosikazi oyedwa ozomkhomba kuNkulunkulu ophilayo, amakhosikazi akhe amaningi adonsela inhliziyo yakhe konkulunkulu.

Izibonelo eziningi, kepha…

ULamekhi, u-Abrahama, u-Isaka, uJakobe, uDavide, uSolomoni – Ziningi izibonelo. Futhi zonke zikude impela nokugculisa, kunalokho ziletha ubuhlungu nenhlupheko. Lokho akusho ukuthi uNkulunkulu akakwazi ukusebenza kulolo bishi, noma ezintweni eziningi, ngabantu bakhe ababi! Uyaqhubeka nokuveza umusa wakhe ngaphambi kwalokho akushilo.

Kepha yebo, Ukuchazwa kwesithembu ebhayibhelini kunezibonelo zokuthi abantu bangaba yiziwula nezoni kangakanani – zichaza lokho. Futhi mhlampe ukuthi abantu (abanjengami nawe) bagaba yiziwulu nezoni kangakanani.

Futhi, isikhumbuzo ngukuthi uNkulunkulu anganqoba ngisho izono zethu nobuwula. Usesebenzile ngoJesu (umyeni) ukuzenzela abantu (umakoti) azahlukanisele bona, abamaziyo futhi abamlandelayo ezindleleni zakhe ezilungile. Ekuholweni, siyakhuleka, ukuba sibe ngabesilisa nabesifazane abaguquliwe.